Stranger things have happened

One of the hardest parts of my job is getting meetings with business owners. Everyone always acts like they are SO busy and can't spare 10 minutes to even give me the time of day. Some are really nice about it but others are just plain horrible.

One of the business owners I called today fell under the horrible category. Let's call him L. L wasn't very nice to me on the phone so I told him I would like the pleasure of meeting him in real life.

"I'll be here all day," he screamed at me with his chain smoker scruffy voice.

I got there at 2 and he was just as mean in person as he was on the phone. Except in person he looked a little more pathetic. He was dirty with stains on his shirt and missing teeth. I actually felt kind of sorry for him. After listening to him complain for 15 minutes I asked him what he did like in life because he seemed to complain about everything.

"I like knives," he replied. "Knives and Cars."

Then he proceeded to show me his knives. He took me on a tour in his knife museum (4 hallways and 2 rooms full of them).

I heard the history behind most of them and finally when I asked how many he had in his collection he told me 3,000.

I left the place at 3:30. That's 1 hour and 15 minutes of knives.

Stranger things have happened.

While I've been out

It's funny how blogging can just get away from you. First you tell yourself that you are only going to skip one day and then the next day rolls around and you don't feel like writing so you can skip that too. And then you log in and realize you haven't updated since Nov 12th. How the heck does that even happen?!

So while I've been gone here are some of the things that have gone on in my life....

I had a birthday and we sure did celebrate. Evidence below:

And since I'm still on my no dessert diet I didn't have any birthday cake or pie or cupcakes or any of that fun stuff this year. Instead I had some frozen yogurt....

Texas boy is no longer in the picture. Or at least I'm trying to make him not in the picture but he can't seem to let go and keeps texting me NON-STOP. I'll update more on him later in a whole new post.

Mario Kart is back in the picture, maybe. At least he wants to be. I haven't decided if I'm okay with that yet. Is it wrong to like someone because they are a firefighter? Firemen always have been my weakness...

All you need is love

Why my parents have grey hair...

I was an out of control child and needed to be the center of attention ALL the time. Luckily I have cool parents who encouraged and embraced my personality.

When I was in kindergarden I told my teacher that I had 5 brothers and sisters just so she would pay attention to me more. It worked until she asked my mom how she handled having so many children and found out I was an only child.

When I was in first grade I made up stories about my teacher becoming a witch and flying around the room and told them to my mom. My imagination was so big that I thought I was telling the truth.

When I was in second grade I got in trouble because I didn't want to watch one of the teachers perform his yearly Hanukkah song. I told him that I had already seen his show last year and was tired of the same ol thing all the time.

When I was in third grade I wouldn't eat breakfast so my mom would give me ice cream just so I would have something in my stomach before school. This was awesome until we had to go around the class and tell everyone what we eat for breakfast. I'm surprised they didn't lock my mom up.

I was always finding new and creative ways to be the center of attention......




The sad thing is I'm probably going to have kids that are 5 times more out of control than I was

Words to live by

At least I didn't quit my day job...

Last week I volunteered at a Halloween carnival for little kids that live in the projects. I signed up to volunteer for this thing thinking I would be running a carnival game or the cotton candy machine.

When I got there the event coordinator came running over to me desperate for another face painter. Turns out one of the ones they had already scheduled couldn't make it so they needed someone else.

Desperate times call for desperate measures and I decided to fake it until I made it. Turns out face painting is A LOT harder than it looks and most of the kids that left my station ended up looking like this.....







At least they had fun right?! And luckily there were no mirrors at the face paint station so they didn't know the difference!


(These are google kids and not pictures of the real faces I painted but they pretty accurately portray my face painting skill level)

You can't judge a book by it's cover but, can you judge a guy by his friends?!

Right before Halloween one of my good friends lost her ID so we were forced to look for things to do that didn't require ID's. I felt like we were back in high school, except for we looked hotter. I rocked the same costume I wore last year calling it my economy outfit. The first party we went to was a bunch of people from high school and we all had a blast dancing, laughing, and catching up.

Then I made my friend leave because I wanted to see Texas boy. Apparently he was at a "party" and wanted us to come. We drove clear across town and showed up to the random address he texted me. There were no cars out front (which should have been our first clue) and when we knocked on the door only 4 people were there, Texas boy and 3 of his friends.

A little disappointed we tried to make the best of the situation until Texas boy's friend started being really mean to us. And not just a little bit but like really really mean. He even threw a ping pong ball at my friends face. Here's the kicker...Texas boy didn't stick up for us. He even said to me, "well you better get along with him because he is going to be my roomate." Umm no.

My friend and I left and decided to end our night at Ihop. I didn't even say bye to Texas boy and my opinion of him changed drastically. That night I went to bed wondering if it was okay to judge a guy by his friends and if this should be a red flag for Texas boy.